Sunday, 8 September 2013

Thank you

In the next month or two, I am going to have to take down most of the rmj blog content for the year 2012, and just about three or so posts from 2013. The book publisher had told me that this time would come, but I hadn’t expected it to come so quickly. Where has the year 2013 gone??

I’ve been meaning to blog about the process of turning the blog into a book. I have just had such a crazy past three months or so that it’s been impossible. That doesn’t mean I won’t do it, though! This post is one step in that direction, actually.

In a nutshell, the manuscript has been reviewed by the editor (more about his suggestions for the book later; and YAY, I've finally taken the time to figure out how to insert a hyperlink!) and has recently been passed on to a copy editor who will clean up all my grammatical errors and typos, etc. I allowed the manuscript to be sent to the copy editor, but pointed out that I still hadn’t written an ‘Acknowledgments’ section. With the distraction of work, I didn’t quite have the presence of mind to tackle that, and so planned to do so later. I also wanted to take the time to go back to the comments section of each blog post to draw up a list of all the commenters so far. If there’s anyone I need to acknowledge, surely it would be the readers that I’m able to identify because of their comments. Well, ‘identify’ is not quite the word because out of all those that have commented since March 2012 when this blog was set up (excluding anonymous commenters), I only know 2 of these readers in person. So I can only ‘identify’ people by the names they’ve chosen to use.

I reviewed every single rmj blog comment yesterday in order to make my list. Although I will be taking down most of the blog posts, I will be saving every single comment, given my fetish for words of affirmation. I had to blink back tears as I re-read many of these comments. I guess because of how far I have come, by God’s grace, along this journey – and how people that I have never even met have come along on this journey with me, anyhow.  What an experience this has been. Who would’ve ever thought, when I finally decided to write down my rambling thoughts, that this simple act would begin to take on a life of its own?

There’ve been times that I’ve wanted to hold back the process, frankly – to rein it in so that it didn’t move too fast for me, or so that I could even change my mind before things went too far. There’ve been times that I’ve wanted to chicken out from moving ahead with publishing the book. Why am I doing this? I’ve sometimes asked myself. I didn’t start out even imagining I would write a book. Why is it important?

I have definitely had moments of doubt, but reading the comments again reminded me of why it’s important. I’ll be blogging a little bit about this topic this week, come hell or high water (so do stay tuned).

There’s this chilling quote by Elbert Hubbard: ‘To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.’ In developing this book, I realize that I will be opening myself up to a number of things, and criticism is only one of them. But I’m more scared of leaving this earth having done nothing, said nothing, and been nothing. I always have been.

I want to say a warm ‘Thank you’ to you all: those that have visited, those that have lurked (I’m a professional lurker myself), those that have signed up to receive the blog posts via email, blogger, etc., those that have shared the posts with others, those that have linked to the blog (I'm discovering each of you slowly but surely), and those that have commented anonymously. I would particularly like to thank those that have commented out in the open; here are their names/pseudonyms:

Ezeji
Alexa
Doris
Seyidott
Alive in STL
Nene
Adaeze Ibechukwu
Michael
PradaPrincipal
Ekene
Rachel Faltus
Bridget
Engagement Ring Company
Demashi
Oluwayemisi
Jemima
Thomas Watson
Nzilani
Unknown
Affy (where are you, Affy??)
Chinny
thewordsmythe
Becky P
Jero
Creative Works
Kitchen Butterfly
LagosMums
Casio
Merrykiks
Tosin
Seke
Laine Harwell
Lucas Boles
Jermaine Gardner
Platinum7
Lohi
Sugabelly
Kiki
Allan Morais
Nkaytchee
Albert Gates
Myne Whitman
Chizy K
Ichie

Many, many thanks.


32 comments:

  1. Yaaaay, I made the list. I have really been enlightened by your posts and have garnered a fresh new perspectives towards marriage and divorce; especially as a dear friend and spiritual mentor is going through this.

    There is indeed life after a bad marriage or divorce and the word has to be put out there, so that folks are not under continual condemnation.

    Demashi

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    1. Hahaha - yeah, you made the Honor Roll! Just kidding. Thanks, Demashi, for all your insightful comments, and for the kind words. I personally have been enlightened by quite a number of things you've had to say. My thoughts are with your friend and mentor.

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  2. Thank you for thanking me and for sharing your beautiful prose that turns pain into painting. I guess that I am one of the first to see the book coming from the blog like the shoot of a new plant thirsting for sunlight. Go there, fear nothing. Using a pseudo name is what superstars do all the time, so do not sweat the small stuff over that. Ichie Ezeji

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    1. Ichie Ezeji. You and your way with words. Yes, you were the first to see it. Thanks for the advice. Thank you.

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  3. Thanks for the acknowledgement....... wish u all the best of success with your book1 God bless u ma'am

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    1. Thank you, Nkaytchee. God bless you!

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  4. yay!! i made the list, you will not believe how much i have learnt about marriage from you, you simply won't, only eternity will reveal what you have been courageous enough to do...i recommend your blog to my married friends a lot so its a pity you will be taking down some posts..but its all good..bless you!

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    1. Yes, you did! Good thing there aren't that many posts on this blog, or I never would've been able to whip up the list. Thank you for visiting and re-visiting, Jemima. One of the most touching comments on this blog actually came from you, and I really appreciate that. Thanks also for recommending the blog to others that might need it. 2012 posts will be gone soon, but most of them will be in the book, so all is not lost. Bless you.

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  5. Wow, that must have taken something, compiling the list. Coming out of the closet (sometimes is good for the soul). Once I was an Anonymous fella and I came out..but it's all good. I hope you appreciate every step of your journey from now on.

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    1. It did take longer than I expected, but I thoroughly enjoyed it. There are so many ways to be 'closeted', and I have to agree that it makes little sense not to live your truth, so to speak. Thank you, Chinny.

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  6. Aww... Thanks RMJ, You won't believe that after i saw the blog title i quickly scanned through the list (lol). Then my heart swelled, my face lit up and my eyes became teary. THANKS to you for coming forth and walking with me through a difficult part of my journey, thanks for providing a "sisterhood" when i badly needed one. I found a lot of comfort coming here from time to time. All the best with the book; i remember i had volunteered to even sell some (lol). Many blessings to you sis.

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    1. Hahaha - you're too, too cute, Casio. That's so sweet of you; thanks so much. I'm grateful for all the times that you've written, and I hope you continue to visit. I wish you all the strength and grace that you need for your journey. It's good to know that I already have a potential sales person (: God bless you.

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    2. I had the exact same reaction as Casio. Especially the "scrolling down to look for my name" part. Typical human behavior. Thanks RMJ for thanking us. We are the ones who should be thanking you. Looking forward to the book. Blessings.

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    3. Aww, thank you, Nzilani. It's been so nice having you visit and hearing from you. I'll keep you posted. Have a good weekend.

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  7. Will miss your blog presence- but see you when you start blogging for book number two! Make I go write my book, joor! ;)

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    1. Oops - didn't mean to create the impression that I won't be blogging anymore. I will, as long as I have something to say and the time to say it. But since the book is made up of much of the blog content from 2012, I will have to take those posts down. But yes, go write your book, jare! ( =

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    2. Prada we've been waiting on this your book...you ain't done already, lol?? Congratulations rmj...I suspect that you my know more of your commentators in person than you think, *wink*

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    3. Hahaha - thank you, LoL Diva. Hmm ... you're probably right. I'm totally oblivious, though, unless a person comments using their real name or a nickname that I know of. Now, I need to crack my brain and figure out who *you* are (-= Thanks for stopping by.

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  8. I am still here. Following you silently but cheering you on loudly in my heart.
    Thank you too.
    Can't wait for the book

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    1. Good to hear you're good, Affy (I've been wondering!). Thanks so much. There's a time for everything - including silence. You keep well.

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  9. Thank you. Friend. For your hope, inspiration, courage, honesty, fragility.

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  10. Awww I am so touched, just saw my name and I'm like Yay! Thank you so much. You are also and inspiration and I'll definitely buy your books.

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  11. Didn't see my name.....as I always sign in as anonymous... but I know that deep in my heart you are grateful to everyone. I have read and re-read every single thing that you have written since 2012....... You are appreciated more than you know. Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity of knowing you through this medium as I have learnt a lot from this blog. Hmmm,,,, I wish you well as you take this bolder step of publishing it as a book. May God bless and keep you....

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    1. I wish I knew your name ( : But I understand the need to be anonymous sometimes. You are right: deep down inside, I am so grateful to you and everyone else that I'm unable to acknowledge by name. I'm touched that you would stop by to re-read all that. It's comments like yours that convince me that a book is worthwhile, despite any challenges that my lie ahead. Thank you for everything. Blessings ...

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  12. Congrats, I'm proud of you, RMJ! You've provided an incredible amount of guidance to so many people that are thinking about, in the middle of, or getting out of this terrain called "marriage". It is well. Your delivery reflects a unique blend of intellect, wit & compassion; a rare find these days. Go get 'em! I will keep popping in when I have a spare moment! :)

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    1. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Much too kind. Do stop by again whenever you can.

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  13. This post made me teary eyed. Sigh. I don't know you but I remembered when I first stumbled on your blog February this year and went through the whole blog. I didn't know what to make of it, I was crying and laughing at the same time. I was so sad because I didn't understand how a Christian marriage could end that way, I was scared of ever getting married. But look at you and how you have handled it, just like you said in one of your old posts about your Dad calling you strong, you are indeed strong. More grease to your elbow, Nnenna.

    Ife. xx

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    1. Dear Ife: Welcome back, and thank you so much for your comment. It's always humbling and gratifying to learn that someone read something you wrote, and came back for more. I'm glad you came back to see how things turned out. If I still believe in marriage, then you definitely should, too! Don't be afraid of it, either. Just be prepared to be wiser and less naive than I was, and you'll be just fine. Bless you.

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  14. Wish there was a way you could leave the blog posts... Still thinking of a way...

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    1. Me, too! If a publisher weren't involved, I'd definitely leave them up. But it's essentially the 2012 posts that'll be taken down eventually ...

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